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“You’re an addict, Marco,” he once told me, with a junkie’s beam of confidence. We went to Chinatown, in London’s West End, for late-night noodles after I had finished service at Harveys. I was 25 years old and Alex was 21, and we managed to keep the relationship going for a year, long enough for me to propose.

“You’re an addict to the warmth,” by which he meant the stove, the cooking, the kitchen, the work. It was all those things which took me one morning to Johnny the Fish, who happened to introduce me to his secretary: Alex Mc Arthur. After dinner we went back to her flat in Kensington. Our relationship had been cemented, as they say, in less than 20 hours. One day in June 1988 we were married in Chelsea Register Office, the place where rock stars tie the knot.

We emerged onto the King’s Road and celebrated at Dino’s café, eating poached eggs on toast.

I had a Michelin star by then but hadn’t considered cooking a sumptuous feast for the occasion. I came from a hard, working-class world which, since my mother’s death, had been dominated by men.

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Once, after the hug, the psychologist touched her patient’s chest, then cut off a lock of her hair and gave it to him.

Or, launching into a solo, he would point the guitar neck theatrically at the crowd while freezing his facial muscles—not into the kind of fish-mouthed orgasmic gape that often makes soloing guitarists the butt of jokes, but into a photogenic grimace that appeared to be the epitome of cool. Jay Spooner, a local photographer and club promoter who, throughout the years, has shot rolls of film capturing Farrell performing, described an e-mailed compliment he’d received from one of Farrell’s many fellow-musician fans around town, Greg “GB” Baxter, the onetime Magnolia Thunderfinger guitarist who now fronts his own band, the Carousers.

“GB said that I did the impossible, by actually capturing Mike Farrell in a photograph with both feet on the ground,” Spooner said.

But therapists say they should never reveal their own sexual feelings to patients.

His dark hair, stylish vintage clothes and lean body make him appear as if he just stepped off an old Yardbirds album cover, circa 1966.

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